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trust God, trees, rainbow, blessings

How To Trust God When Life Gets Tough

How To Trust God When The Going Gets Tough

Hello! I’m so glad you’re here! There’s a chill in the air this morning so I invite you to pull up a chair, grab a cup of something warm, and join me for a visit.

If you’re new to the blog, you’ve joined us in the midst of a personal experience story about how to trust God when life throws you a serious curve ball. You are more than welcome to jump right in here! But I would like to encourage you to go back at least four posts to the start of the real estate purchase part of the story. Or even at the beginning of the “Miracles Series”. It will help this post make more sense. But you are more than welcome to start right here!

If you decide to read the earlier posts there are links at the end of this post.

For you that have been following along, I have a favor to ask. If you’re enjoying this story, please leave a comment. Even if it’s just one word! That way I know you’re reading it! And hopefully enjoying it!

Also, if you have trouble posting your comment please let me know! Please send me an email to kristi@kristiross.com and let me know! Some people are having trouble posting comments. THANK YOU!!

Ok, let’s get back to our story!!

The Still Small Voice

From last week’s post you know that “still, small, voice” deep down inside moved me to check out a real estate listings website which led me to finding the place with the trees I’ve been admiring for several years.

But it was way out of my price range. And the sellers real estate agent said they would NOT accept an offer for lower than their purchase price.

But I made a lower offer anyway. Not a low-ball offer, but a solid, value based offer.

The property had been on the market for a couple years and the owners had already received some offers, but had not accepted them.

Before they listed the property for sale, the owners had prayed for the “right person” to buy their place. None of the previous offers felt “right“.

Months earlier I had prayed for God’s perfect place for me here in the Cortez area.

When I came to look at the property and stepped out of the car crying because I had found the beautiful trees I had admired for years,

trust God, trees, rainbow, blessings

they felt I would love the place and I was “the right person”.

But they still countered my offer.

We countered back.

And they took that offer!

But The Deal Was A Long Way From Done

Now that I had a contract I could see if I could get financing.

But that was going to take a miracle.

Between my business tanking with the economy, Delta County not being able to renew my contract, and rentals that had been vandalized and sat empty for months, my credit worthiness was in the . . . well . . .  I’ll keep it mildly clean . . . the toilet.

Normally, to buy a house you have 20% down, and get a mortgage. Right? Well that was not going to happen for me. Back when I thought I was going to be homeless because my roommate moved back to Delta County, I had been scrambling and found a farm loan program that would work if, and that’s a BIG if, the property was ag, and everything fit together perfectly.

The loan application was almost an inch thick! But I bravely worked through it. When I turned it in the loan officer immediate had a list of additional information he needed to just get started.

I worked diligently to gather the additional information.  And frankly, if it hadn’t been for an incredibly generous friend, and believe it or not, my ex-husband, the loan would never have happened. But with their generous help I was able to get a couple big items that popped up on my credit report paid off.

That really seemed to make a difference with my loan officer. It started to look like this was a possibility. But there were so many issues I didn’t get my hopes up. At all!

I just prayed over it every day and asked for God’s will with the purchase and all dealings associated with it.

Learning How To Trust God and His Timelines

On a normal contract to purchase there is a timeline. The specified dates are set and agreed upon for each the necessary components needed to complete the sale/purchase. Each task was tied to a date and those dates are agreed upon before the contract is signed.

The first issue to rear its ugly head with the timeline turned out to be because of the lender. The Farm Credit Agency didn’t know if they were even going to get funded for 2015.

Talk about bursting your bubble!

All that work on the contract, diligent work on the loan application, getting old bills cleaned up, only to have every thing put on hold for a month because of the government.

We signed the contract in early November, but the government didn’t approve the 2015 ag service budget until the end of January. By then we had missed several deadlines and had to change all the dates.

The sellers real estate agent was not pleasant about it, but every time there was an issue the seller and I were able to work everything out and come to an amicable agreement.

This irritated the seller’s agent immensely.

Things were finally moving along and everything looked good, until I tried to get commitments from the surrounding neighbors for the additional irrigation water the sellers had been using.

One neighbor had sold the two shares the sellers had been using and the other neighbor simply didn’t trust a “newby” and wouldn’t let me use it.

I finally located additional water and agreed to lease it, if the sale went through.

Things were once again moving forward.

Until we got to the appraisal back.

There was a problem with the boundary lines on the plat map. It didn’t match the survey on record.

The owner said he had paid for a plat map update and he was not going to provide a survey.

This was a big problem. I was not going to buy property that didn’t match the legal records.

The lender would not fund the loan if the situation wasn’t corrected.

It was the sellers agent’s responsibility to get the paperwork corrected, but she was having plastic surgery of some sort and couldn’t be bothered with the details.

So I went to work.  I worked with the County Planner, the Assessor, the County Land Use Department, the County Attorney, the surveyor . . .

You get the picture.

On Tuesday I was finally able to get the surveyor to sign off on the correct information.  The closing was scheduled for Friday morning.

Miraculously it looked like the deal might actually go through.

But late Wednesday afternoon my lender called and said neither the title company or the sellers agent had called him to confirm the closing. So no funds had been requested. It took two days to request and wire in the funds. There was no way to close on Friday.

The sellers agent went ballistic!

Add to all this, we were still at a stalemate over who was paying for the survey.

I gave up.

My sister and I had a long talk about it. There were several times throughout the course of this ordeal that we were both ready to throw in the towel and then some miraculous thing would happen and the disaster of the day would smooth over and the deal would be back on again.

Was I being tested? Was this an exercise in learning to trust God more?

But the cost of the survey and now, no funds were more than I could take.

I told her apparently this is not meant to happen.

I was tired of the fighting, tired of the stress.

I was done.

The deal was done.

Or was it???

You’ll have to come back next week and find out!

Make sure you don’t miss a single post by joining us as a subscriber!  Simply click this link:  THIS LINK TO SUBSCRIBE: www.kristiross.com/subscriber

I PROMISE to Never give away or sell your email address so you can subscribe with confidence!

Have a Great and Godly day!

And remember to trust God!

Previous Miracle Posts:

Post #1  How To Experience  Miracles in Your Life

Post #2  Who Wants Miracles In Their Life?

Post #3  What Happens When Miracles Don’t Look Pretty

Post #4  How Tragedy Can Create Miracles

Post #5  When Miracles Bring Transformation

 Post #6  What Do Miracles Look Like

Post #7  Are You In Need Of A Miracle?

Post #8  Where Can You Find A Miracle

Post #9  Miracles Keep Coming

Post #10 How To Step Into The Miracle Zone

Post #11    3 Simple Steps to Miracles In Your Life
Post #12   3 Steps to Holiday Miracles and Peace
Post #13   How Trusting God Can Transform Your Life

Post #14 Fear Why Are We Afraid?

Post #15  Does God Still Answer Prayer?

 

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Good Friday, Jesus, death and resurrection, God, love

Good Friday Truth

Requested Redo

It’s Good Friday and a friend request this post again. I don’t ordinarily like to recycle a post, but as I read back through this one I decided there is nothing I want to change. It still speaks my heart on Good Friday.

Good Friday

Good Friday

It was my sin

Good Friday Hurts

Empty

Lost

Alone

Heartsick

A sadness that is gut wrenchingly deep

There is no blue in the sky

No birds sing

Only a cold wind blows

Tears from Heaven fall in thunderous torrents

Pain that wrings all emotions out of the heart

Tortured

A beard torn from his face

A crown of thorns and

A purple robe

Three nails

One hammer

Painfully

Excruciatingly

Death comes as slowly

“Father forgive them for they know no what they do”

“It is finished”

Good Friday, Jesus, death and resurrection, God, love

Good Friday is not the End! It is the Beginning!

 

Good Friday has never been “good” in my mind.

It is too hurtful to remember that the Lord hung on a cross because He loved me enough to die for me over 2000 years ago.

How incredible is that?

We love because He first loved us! (John 4:19)

What a statement!

Have you taken the time to remember today?

Have you spent any time thinking about the fact that Jesus came to earth with one purpose.

One goal.

To die.

So we might live.

And live more abundantly. (John 10:10)

I hope you take time to consider this today.

If this post touched you, please tell me in the comments section.

If it doesn’t . . . that’s between you and God.

 

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Jesus, love, God, peace

Finding Peace In 3 Steps

Is Peace Possible in Today’s World?

Rush, rush, rush!

Everyone is rushing here and there, doing more in less time.

Companies cutting back staff resulting in fewer employees doing more work.

For less pay!

We see it all around us.

Have you experienced any of this?

Not very peaceful is it?

But would you like to find more peace?

Is that possible?

You bet it is!

Walk with me the next few days and let’s see if we can’t make a difference.

Let’s see if together we can create more peace in your life, and your families and loved ones lives.

Walk With Me

PLEASE read through this once and then go back and re-read it. Let’s start this process together and see if this works.

Walk with me for a bit please.

Step One:

Close your eyes . . . Breathe deep . . . Relax . . .

Walk with me . . .

We’re on a cobblestone road

In the warm, spring, sunshine

Palm fronds rustle in a gentle breeze

Breathe deep and catch a hint of the sea

There’s a large crowd gathered ahead of us on a hillside.

What is going on?

There is a man speaking.

We walk closer . . .

The man is speaking about God.

He calls Him our Father God.

Let’s sit and listen a little while.

Hummm . . .

Jesus, love, God, peace

Jesus teaching on love and peace

He is talking about “turning the other cheek” when someone is ugly or unpleasant (Matthew 5:39), “going the extra mile” (Matthew 5:41), “loving your enemies” (Matthew 5:44), “treating others the way you want them to treat you” (Luke 6:31).

The man speaking is named Jesus. His teachings are unrivaled for their penetrating simplicity.

He is trying to describe how wide, and long, and deep, and high God’s love for us is (Ephesians 3:18-19)

We’re sitting beside a man and his family.  He leans over and quietly tells us how he was blind all his life and had to beg to feed his family. Until the man speaking healed him.  He said, “Jesus spit in the dirt, made mud balls, and put it on my eyes. The he told me to go wash in the Pool of Siloam. When I washed the mud off, I could see!” (John 9:5-7)

His family and neighbors sitting around us all testify this is true. He had been blind since birth, but now can see perfectly.

We listen as Jesus teaches about not just loving your neighbors, but also loving your enemies. (Matthew 5:43-48 and Luke 6:27)

Have you ever really thought about how difficult that is?

Have you ever prayed for your enemies? For those you know hate you?

Let’s try it.

Step Two:

Close your eyes again and think of someone that has hurt you. Someone that makes no question about it they do not like you. Or someone that has broken your heart.

You know the person.

The one you just can’t forgive, and unfortunately can’t forget.

Think of them. Bring them up in your mind.

Hear their hurtful words.

Feel the sting in your heart.

Now . . .

Step Three:

Together, let’s pray for them.

Take another deep breath and say the words that come up in your heart.

Not your mind,

But your heart.

Speak it.

Now pause, breath deep and say,

“I forgive you.”

Now, continue with, “Father God, please bless __________ (put your person’s name in the blank)

Father God, I forgive them for the hurt they have done to me. Please forgive them Father.

Lord, I ask you to bring blessings into their lives. Bring someone that will shine the light of your love into their life.

Father, I ask this for them. Father, please love them.

Father, I give them to you and ask for your perfect will for them.

Father, I release them to you.”

Tough

I know that was not easy.

And you probably don’t think it made a difference.

You may even be angry at me for walking you into that.

If so, please forgive me.

But you  need to speak it till you see it.

So feel the hurt, and do it anyway.

Forgiveness, Leads to Healing, Leads to Freedom and Peace

This will start you on a path to healing, forgiveness, and FREEDOM!

Now isn’t that worth it?

I thought so.

Here are the steps for you to copy and keep:

  • Step 1:  Breathe deep, relax, and feel love emanating from your heart
  • Step 2:  Allow yourself to feel and acknowledge the pain and heartache
  • Step 3:  PRAY FOR THAT PERSON!  Ask God to love them and forgive them and speak words of forgiveness for them.

Thank You For Joining Me!

Thank you dear readers! I treasure each and every one of you and I’m honored to have you here! I truly hope you’ll consider signing up, or subscribing, to receive email updates when there is a new blog post, or new, exciting info about contests, and God Willing, my upcoming books!!

If you have anyone you want to share the blog with, please do so  and have them let me know you referred them and your name will go into the hat for our monthly give away!

Click THIS LINK TO SUBSCRIBE: www.kristiross.com/subscriber

I PROMISE to Never give away or sell your email address so you can subscribe with confidence!

Have a Great and Godly day!

Copyright © 2013, 2014, & 2015   Kristi Ross, All rights reserved.
Our mailing address is:
Kristi Ross
21795 Road W
Lewis, CO 81327

 

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miracles, stress, peace, Christmas, holiday

3 Simple Steps to Holiday Miracles and Peace

This is Post #12 in the Miracles Series

If you are new to this blog I encourage you to go back and read the previous 11 posts in the Miracle Series so this one makes better sense. Here are links to each of them:

Post #1  How To Experience  Miracles in Your Life

Post #2  Who Wants Miracles In Their Life?

Post #3  What Happens When Miracles Don’t Look Pretty

Post #4  How Tragedy Can Create Miracles

Post #5  When Miracles Bring Transformation

 Post #6  What Do Miracles Look Like

Post #7  Are You In Need Of A Miracle?

Post #8  Where Can You Find A Miracle

Post #9  Miracles Keep Coming

Post # 10 How To Step Into The Miracle Zone 

Post #11   3 Simple Steps to Miracles in Your Life

 

miracles, stress, peace, Christmas, holiday

The Reason for the Season By Two Hearts Design.com

 

Miracle Peace

Do you agree that Christmas is a time of wonder and miracles?

It’s a wonderful time, full of family, love, and good cheer.

But it’s also a time of stress.

Why is that?

Why do we get so stressed at this time of year?

Because we take our eyes off the reason for the season and focus on the material aspect.

We get wrapped up in presents, holiday parties, cleaning for company,  rushing, rushing, rushing. . .

Well, I have a little story to share and then I would like to help you take a moment, refocus, and give you some tools to handle the holiday season maybe just a bit better.

Story Time

It’s been a while since I’ve posted because just like you I’ve been incredibly busy. Plus, as I’ve mentioned before, Christmas is a difficult time for me because of losing my Mom and Dad during the holidays.

Honestly, I lost my inspiration to write. I didn’t have anything joyful to say so I just didn’t write.

But today I had a reminder that even when we aren’t paying attention God is working.

Even when we are distracted by whatever, He is there. Working. Waiting to reveal another glimpse of Himself.

Miracle at 4:10 PM

I work in Human Services and since this is open enrollment we are SLAMMED!

I have been trying to get caught up so I could actually take the vacation days I’ve requested, Christmas Eve, and January 2nd.  So when the front desk girl came to my office at 4:10 PM and told me I had a client waiting to see me, I’ll admit, I was not happy.

I had a stack of work left and we close at 4:30. I didn’t want to take the time to see her. Especially when she wouldn’t tell the receptionist what she wanted.

I could have said no.

But I saw her.

After visiting with the woman for a few minutes I could feel the sadness and hurt in her life. She too had lost her parents and was struggling with decisions and choices.

My heart went out to her.

Before either of us knew what was going on we were talking about farming and I was sharing a little about my struggles over the past year. I shared with her that even in the darkest times, God is working.

He has a plan.

And His plans are to bless us far more than we can even dream for ourselves.

Before long we were praying.

Right there in my office.

And I was thanking God for this woman who had reminded me how God works in mysterious ways.

He is a God of miracles.

My miracle walked in the office at 4:10 today.

Re-Motivated

This woman with her questions and issues broke through my writers block.

She re-motivated me.

I wish I could thank her for breaking through the ice around my heart.

Thank her for being my Christmas Eve – Eve Miracle!

Steps for Peaceful Holidays

So now I have something else to share with you.

Three steps to help you make with through the rest of the holidays.

Step One:  Pause

I know you’re saying what? She wants me to pause? But I barely have time to read her silly blog, I don’t have time to pause.

I know

But do it anyway.

Pause wherever you are right now and . . . breathe . . . deeply.

Blow every bit of that breathe out all the way to your toes.

Now breathe in deeply and SLOWLY

Hold it. . .

Now let it out slowly

Do it again.  With your eyes closed if you aren’t driving.

If you’re driving

WHY ARE YOU READING!  STOP! Read this later!!

Step Two: Smile

What? Smile?

Yes!

I know your thinking, “Kristi, I don’t have time for this nonsense! I thought you were going to tell me about a Christmas Miracle and instead you’re having me Smile! Get on with it girl!”

Did you know that smiling causes the body to produce endorphins, the happiness hormone?

So now will you trust me?

Smile please!

Breath deep,

And SMILE again!

Step Three:  Practice gratitude

Think of something you are truly thankful for.

Your family, your home, your job

Now, say this out loud, “Thank for my _____________” (fill in the blank)

Okay, let’s do all three together!

Breathe deep, slowly let it out,  SMILE BIG, and say thank you while really feeling the gratitude.

There now, don’t you feel better?

Just that little exercise can refocus you, re-energize, and de-stress you!

Will you join me in doing these simple steps several times a day from now till the New Year?

I Promise you will experience more Miracles and a great deal more Peace!

Is 2015 YOUR Year Of Miracles?

If you are interested in learning more about Walking in the Miracle Zone I would like to invite you to join me  in Your Year Of Miracles, a training I have participated in that opened my eyes to the miracles in my life.  I hope you’ll check out this free event and consider joining me in the program in 2015!

God Bless!

Are you enjoying this series?

I certainly hope so! Do you know anyone else who might also? If so, please copy and share the following link via email, Facebook, Twitter, etc.    How To Experience  Miracles in Your Life

If you have anyone you want to share it with, please do so soon because we only have a few more Miracle posts to go.

Never want to miss a new post?  Click THIS LINK TO SUBSCRIBE: www.kristiross.com/subscriber

I PROMISE to Never give away or sell your email address so you can subscribe with confidence!

Have a Great and Godly day!

Copyright © 2013, 2014, & 2015   Kristi Ross, All rights reserved.
Our mailing address is:
Kristi Ross
21795 Road W
Lewis, CO 81327

 

 

 

 

 

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miracles, miracles, God, God's love, family, love

What Does God’s Love Really Feel Like?

God, God's love, family, love

God’s Glorious Crown

No Greater Love

My daughter did it again. She called me out on not going deeper.

She’s right.

I wrote a nice little surface post about 7 simple love steps but didn’t put my heart and soul into it.

Love is an emotion that lifts us up, carries us, and breaks us down.

No other emotion effects us more. It deserves deeper thought and consideration. But there are so many facets we will have to break it into bite sized pieces for reflection.

God’s Love

Let’s start on the love that started this very blog.

The Love of God.

Oh boy, how do we put that one into words?

There is a children’s song that says, “God’s love is higher than the highest mountain, deeper than the sea.”

Having lived a life alone with God for many years I can tell you from walking in it, that little song doesn’t begin to explain how incredible God’s love for us is!

Let’s see if this opens some heart’s doors. . .

Are any of you parents?

That was a trick question, I know you are.

Stop for a minute and think about your children. Let that love swell up in your chest. Till it hurts. Think about how proud of them you are. Even when they’re not at their best we love them so much we wouldn’t think twice about diving in front of a moving vehicle, or even taking a bullet to save them, would we?

We would die to save our children.  Wouldn’t we?

They are the most important thing in our life.

Right?

Of course they are.

What makes you think God loves you any less than that?

I grew up in a church that had me scared of God.

If I didn’t do everything right I would have to deal with God’s wrath. I would make Him mad and He would punish me.

Well, trust me, I’ve done things, still do things that hurt Him. But He still loves me enough to die for me!

I hurt Him when I do something stupid, but He never stops loving me!

One of my favorite parts in ANY movie,  is in the Passion of the Christ when Jesus is on the cross, dieing, and the camera zooms away to Heaven and one giant tear falls from Heaven to earth and causes the earthquake.

That is how much God and Jesus love us.

Feel God’s Love

Pause with me a minute. Close your eyes again and breath in that kind of love. Open you heart to the pure, sweet, incredible love of God. The love He wants to fill you up with. Fill you up to overflowing and it spills out on others so they can experience it.

Love that you feel in your heart, your mind, your throat, all the way to your finger tips, and the hair stands up on the back of your neck.  Float in a sea of love washing over you in wave after wave of pure peace and joy.

Open you mind and your heart to it. Love far deeper than we have for our own children. Love more profound than our human minds can rationalize. Love that makes your heart feel like it will explode!

That’s only the tip of the iceberg of how much God loves us!

God is our FATHER!

Not our condemner!

He is the lover of our soul!

No matter what we’ve done. He Loves Us. Purely and completely.

Close your eyes again and breath in that kind of forgiving, caring, nurturing love.

See God’s Love

Look around you and see God’s creation today. Every beautiful thing, every amazing creature, is a testimony to God’s love for us.

His love carries us through hell on earth and prepares us for a family dinner at HIS table.

Do you think He has mashed potatoes?  I hope so!  🙂

Curious

I am extremely curious to hear what thoughts and emotions this post created in you.  Would you share with me in the comments section please?  I need the feedback!  Did this post touch you?  Or am I just a talking bobble-head???

Thanks so much for being here! God Bless you!

 

Copyright © 2013 & 2014 Kristi Ross, All rights reserved.
Our mailing address is:
Kristi Ross
PO Box 133
Hotchkiss, CO 81419

 

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change, tansformation, butterfly

Not More Change and Choices!

Things are rapidly changing. Have you noticed that? My entire life seems to be about change.

And we have so many choices for things we buy everyday it’s hard to figure out what we’re having for dinner!

According to Seth Godin there are 19,000,000 different flavors at Starbucks!

No wonder I struggle making a beverage decision! And also no wonder when I find one I like I don’t change. Am I a total oddball, or are you that way? Or are you one of those adventurous types that try a different flavor every time.

 

Here I’ve been working on my first podcast and worried about everything. What I say, how I say it, is it relevant, is it engaging. Did you know there are 17,000,000 podcasts? And a video of an interestingly unique New Jersey teen lip-sinking and doing a goofy dance to Dragostea din tei, or Numa Numa, an “oddball Rumanian song” (Seth Godin)  has, at the moment of my typing received 53,886,991 hits! That’s almost 59 million views! 59 MILLION!

You don’t believe me? Click here and check it out!

And trust me, this kid is not worried if his ideas are noteworthy, doesn’t for a moment consider his how his hair looks,  or if his makeup is ok, or worry about his lighting. He just spontaneously dances to a crazy, foreign song!

You ask me why am I telling you all this.

That’s a good question.

Because I’m going to change some things on here.

change, tansformation, butterfly

Change can be beautiful!

I’m going to stop worrying so much about what I say and how I say it.

So get ready!  There’s no telling what you may see or hear! But first, I want to hear from YOU!

What would YOU like to talk about on here?

This one sided conversation stuff ends right here!

If you are still reading, I WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!

Right down there ↓ ↓ is the “COMMENTS” section. I NEED YOU to Please share with me your ideas. At least one, but today More is Better!

So what will it be???  More about God?  Jesus? Horses?  Dogs?  Ranch life? Moving? Cats?  Surviving as a single parent? Farming?   Rodeo? Writing??  What do YOU want to talk about??

I’m listening!

My choice, writing, blog post, listening

Hummm… What do I want?

 

 

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Responsibility, I Let You Down

Responsibility

Have you ever had a come-upance? That’s where someone calls you on your “stuff” and you have to acknowledge they are right. Then you are faced with either dealing with your “stuff”, or ignoring it.

That happened to me today.

My daughter gave me a come-upance on my blogging during and following the move. Essentially, she said I had shirked my responsibility to be real with my readers during a very difficult time.

She was right.

I have.

I used the excuse of not having internet to not sit down and share what I was going through. Well, that ends right here. And I apologize. I will never leave you out of what is happening ever again. I have a responsibility to be open and honest if you are to ever really trust me.

Time To Tell The Truth

In reality I think I didn’t write because I was struggling so hard trying to keep it together. I couldn’t write. It would have been too painful. I would have actually had to look at my situation rather than just try to survive it.

I was a wreck.

I thought I covered it up pretty well, but I was drowning. I did in two weeks what should have taken me a month. Then every weekend I was driving back trying to finish in two days what should have taken two weeks. I would rush home, work myself literally to tears, and bloody fingers, then drive back to Cortez so I could be at work Monday morning all smiles, cool, calm, and collected. Trying to make a good impression and let them know the job was important to me.

But it was all a front. Inside I was falling totally apart. I didn’t want to seem weak. But in reality I have never been more afraid or weaker. I felt totally lost. Still do. I left every scrap of security I have fought my entire life for, threw it to the wind, jumped in my truck and drove away to live in a rented house, and work for total strangers, at a job I didn’t know if I could do.

Talk about losing your base. I had nothing. And frankly, there are still times where I feel like I will never have the wind back in my sails. And I swear I’m not feeling sorry for myself. I’m just being totally, utterly, honest.

Responsibility to Be Brutally Honest

After writing those previous words, now I know for certain the reason I couldn’t write this before. I’m crying like a baby as I write it, now.  I can only imagine what a wreck I would have been if I would have tried to write it while I was floundering so badly. As I look at it now all I see are “I’s” and I feel like I’m whining. I don’t whine, I don’t complain, I shoulder into whatever the situation is and go do what needs to be done.

Vulnerable isn’t in my vocabulary.

Weak isn’t either.

But in the past three months I’ve been both, many times. Most times.

Heck, I am right now.

I’m as vulnerable as I ever get. I’m spilling my guts to you. Writing my heartache on a sheet of white paper for your review, reflection, and comments. And frankly that terrifies me as well. I know I have to reestablish your trust in me. But I’m terrified I won’t be able to win you back.

If I have no readers, then I truly have nothing to say that really matters.

That is terrifying.

So there you have it.

I have no ideas or suggestions today. No witty words. No novel thoughts. I only have raw, open truth.

Responsibility to Rebuild

During this move I faced leaving behind family and friends that I have worked many years to build solid relationships with. Women of value and strength of character. And a small circle of men I could trust. That’s a very hard thing for a single woman to do. And now, I have left them all. And I’m out of my element here. Every time I turn around it seems I need help. How I hate being needy. That is not a characteristic I want. Ever.

I have lived my life being strong. Courageous. Independent. 

I feel bad for my daughter and son-in-law. I’m sure they feel I’m a burden. I don’t ever want to be a burden. To anyone. Ever. 

The funny thing is I’ve lived in other places, Texas, Oklahoma, eastern Colorado so moving is not the root of my issues. It is leaving the solid personal foundation I’ve build over my entire lifetime. Striving to be a better person, surrounded by people I loved, in a community that I cared very deeply about.

And now I’m a stranger. On the outside looking in.

That is such an empty feeling.

But like I always say, feelings are fleeting. Mine are no different than the next person’s. My feelings will change. I will be strong again. Someday.

I have no doubt God brought me here. That’s what I’ve clung to through all this. That, and my daughter, son-in-law, and coming Grandchild.

I Will Be Strong Again.

I am a survivor. I will make it through this. And it will happen before that baby arrives. I am determined to be putting roots in the ground again and getting my footing by then. Each day I feel myself growing a bit stronger.

Funny how walking back through all of this with you just now took me right back to my most vulnerable weaknesses. But in writing it, I had to face them. My weaknesses and vulnerabilities. And by doing that, now I see I really am going through this. I’m not stuck!  I’m moving through it and am already stronger.

Facing my fears has taken away their strength to control me.

Have any of you ever faced a time of weakness and vulnerability that you would like to share? It might do the same thing for you that it has for me. Looking at our fears takes their power away. Then we can address them rather than continue to run from them. 

If you want to share here, in the comments section, that would be great. If you prefer a more personal interaction, please feel free to email me at kristi@kristiross.com.  We can talk there if you prefer.

Thank you and God Bless you!

Thank you Mika. I love you!

 

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YOU have my heart!

 

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TRUTH

 

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Stepping Into The Light of A New Beginning!

Copyright © 2014 Kristi Ross, All rights reserved.
Our mailing address is:  Kristi Ross, PO Box 133, Hotchkiss, CO 81419

 

 

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How to be Happy Not Stressed

Be Happy

Third in a series on how to be happy not stressed the midst of chaos or a disaster.

When I wrote “Be Happy” I wanted to sing, “Don’t worry. . . be happy!” That is a wonderful dream isn’t it?

But can we live life, dealing with stressful issues, and not worry, but instead be happy? I believe it is possible.

Catching You Up

In the last post I was sitting on the ditch bank watching the new, expensive, culvert being installed, playing games with my shadow rather than worrying about how much this beaver dam situation is costing us. When I looked up and saw my little band of broodmares standing at the gate to the river bottom watching us.

Mares at the gate

I elbowed my niece, Lisa and pointed out the mares. We talked about how funny it was they were watching us. About that moment I realized the best mare in the bunch was lame. Needless to say I headed her direction. When I reached her, she had badly injured on her front leg.

The road to the barn was cut wide open having a new culvert installed so I had to walk the injured mare a mile through three pastures to get her back where I could clean the wound and doctor her.

Normally I would have been a stressed out mess. Worried sick about how to get her back, how badly cut she was, wondering what had happened and how would I ever find where she had gotten hurt so I could make sure no other horse got injured in the same manner.

But today, after finding peace in the midst of chaos and stress with the entire beaver pond, new culvert, road gashing experience, I decided it did no good to worry and stress. I had no choice but to go slow and enjoy the walk as we worked our way back to the barn.

So rather than rush and hurt the mare more, we slowly strolled through pasture after pasture.  Because we were moving so slowly I saw my pastures from an entirely new perspective. Here are a few photos I snapped we walked.

Tall, pond grass

Tall Grass blowing, Be happy not stressed, stress management, happy, joy, relaxed, stress, Colorado, mountains, river, horses, cattle, cowboys, therapy, walk, backhoe, mud, beaver, beaver dam, anger, stress, kindness, worry, injury, finance

Tall, pond grass, blowing in the breeze

Spiders have been extremely busy!

Spider webs in the sunlight, Be happy not stressed, stress management, happy, joy, relaxed, stress, Colorado, mountains, river, horses, cattle, cowboys, therapy, walk, backhoe, mud, beaver, beaver dam, anger, stress, kindness, worry, injury, finance

Spiders have been busy! Webs glistening in the sun

One spider web blowing in the breeze

One web blowing

A weed with webs becomes a thing of beauty

Weed, spider webs, & light, Be happy not stressed, stress management, happy, joy, relaxed, stress, Colorado, mountains, river, horses, cattle, cowboys, therapy, walk, backhoe, mud, beaver, beaver dam, anger, stress, kindness, worry, injury, finance

Weed becomes a thing of beauty

Zanny excitedly greeting her new friend over the fence

Zanny running, Be happy not stressed, stress management, happy, joy, relaxed, stress, Colorado, mountains, river, horses, cattle, cowboys, therapy, walk, backhoe, mud, beaver, beaver dam, anger, stress, kindness, worry, injury, finance

Zanny running

The horses coming from the pasture – the colt has a passenger!

Pete with Bird on his back, Be happy not stressed, stress management, happy, joy, relaxed, stress, Colorado, mountains, river, horses, cattle, cowboys, therapy, walk, backhoe, mud, beaver, beaver dam, anger, stress, kindness, worry, injury, finance

Hummm a passenger!

The little bird rode almost the entire length of the pasture.

Pete and bird close up, Be happy not stressed, stress management, happy, joy, relaxed, stress, Colorado, mountains, river, horses, cattle, cowboys, therapy, walk, backhoe, mud, beaver, beaver dam, anger, stress, kindness, worry, injury, finance

Passenger rode all the way

The trek to the barn became a relaxing stroll of one enchanting moment to the next, rather than a stressful, worry filled, walk. The mare did fine as long as we went slow and my stress level stayed low because I took the opportunity to enjoy the time rather than fret.

Now, do you think you can be happy and not stressed when you face a challenge this week?

What are YOUR stress relieving strategies?

Please share in the Comments Section below!

Copyright © 2013 Kristi Ross, All rights reserved.

If you enjoyed this post or any others please hit the “subscribe” in the top or side menu bars and sign up for notification when I post a new update on the blog or the books!  Thank you and God Bless!

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Ken Davis, Michael Hyatt, SCORRE, improve communication skills, Colorado, mountains, ski, ski areas, Vail, Beaver Creek, God, prayer, self improvement, speaking, fear, courage, joy, grace, bronze sculpture, Avon, horses running, horses, dog

How to Improve Communication Skills

Improve Communication Skills

Thank you for requesting more information on how to improve communication skills!   The past week at SCORRE honestly changed my life and I’m excited to share what I learned.

Living without communication can be a sad existence. My daughter’s Dachshund, Brutus, is a prefect example of life without communication.

communication skills, happy, deaf, dog

Brutus the giant

Brutus was a sweet, active, social, happy little dog. He would “sing” or howl along with you during songs and at weird noises, especially sheep “baaing”.

But in the last couple years Brutus has gone deaf. Unless you make a point of petting him, carrying him, and interacting with him physically, he will simply lie on the floor and not move. He is depressed.

Communication is vital. It conveys life through information and emotions.

We are required to communicate whether it comes from our voice, written word, signing, or body language. We all use it, and can learn to be better by applying some strategies and following a simple format.

Today we will lay the foundation according Dynamic Communicators International and their SCORRE Format for how to improve communication skills. Please ask questions in the Comments Section so we can go deeper in this!

Now I know these sound simple, but do you consciously write these down before starting to communication in whatever format? Please keep that in the forefront of your mind as you read through these.

SCORRE:

  • Subject – Before we write anything we should decide on our subject. What do we want to talk about or convey. Then we choose a “single aspect” as our Central Theme
  • Central Theme – The “Central Theme helps the speaker/writer focus on what he/she wants to talk about.”
  • Objective – “Writing an Objective forces the speaker/writer to consider the Purpose” of their communication.
  • Rational -A powerful Rational “provides the logical framework for persuasion and encouragement.”  The Rational is the road-map to lead the listener or reader to your objective.
  • Resources – Resources add “light, color, and clarity” to what you are trying to say. They “keep the listener or reader interested” and should “personalize” your points.
  • Evaluation – This step makes sure we stop, and ask ourselves, “Do I know what I’m talking about, and is it worth my listener or reader’s time?”  After we write or speak we should ask the listeners what they thought. Did they grasp what we were trying to share? Do they have questions?

I would encourage you to go back over these and think them through. They sound so simple. But in their simplicity comes power. They are transforming me, and hopefully will improve my communication skills.

Okay, this is very frightening!  I am opening myself up to public evaluation.  Please share your thoughts on this post and the information provided in the Comments Section below.

Do you see how it could help improve communication skills for you?

Now for a little fun!  Here are some of the photos from the trip!

I stopped on the ramp and took this through my window with my cell phone –

Ken Davis, Michael Hyatt, SCORRE, improve communication skills, Colorado, mountains, ski, ski areas, Vail, Beaver Creek, God, prayer, self improvement, speaking, fear, courage, joy, grace

Beaver Creek through my car window at the exit ramp

Driving into town there is a cul-de-sac right in the middle of town. I was admiring the scene and the ski area beyond me.  But notice the little shinny spot just above the red car on the lower left.

Ken Davis, Michael Hyatt, SCORRE, improve communication skills, Colorado, mountains, ski, ski areas, Vail, Beaver Creek, God, prayer, self improvement, speaking, fear, courage, joy, grace, bronze sculpture, Avon, horses running, horses, dog

Coming to the cul-de-sac in downtown Avon looking up at Beaver Creek

 

When I looked up at that cul-de-sac and saw this I literally gasped!

Ken Davis, Michael Hyatt, SCORRE, improve communication skills, Colorado, mountains, ski, ski areas, Vail, Beaver Creek, God, prayer, self improvement, speaking, fear, courage, joy, grace, bronze sculpture, Avon, horses running, horses, dog

Bronze Horses in the center of Avon!

And one more for today – A view from the Beaver Creek Golf Course

Beaver Creek Golf Course

So, any comments?  Or hopefully any questions on how to improve communication skills??

 

If you enjoyed this, or any other post, I would encourage you to click the “SUBSCRIBE” button on the top or side menu bar so you never miss a post!  Thank you and God Bless!

Copyright © 2013 Kristi Ross, All rights reserved.

 

 

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Anger and frustration

5 Quick Tips About Difussing Anger and Frustration

Have you ever been frustrated?

Sorry I don’t have any photos for you today.  This has been a dilemma for me today and I am extremely frustrated right now!  Have you ever experienced anger and frustration? Sure, we all have!

I have tried to add photos to another post I had planned on having here.  But each time I upload a photo they grow into GIANT size.  A GIANT photo is not a good thing to have in a blog post!

So needless to say I’m extremely frustrated!  It takes a great deal to make me start venting, but this has!  When you experience  anger and frustration is it like throwing gas on a fire?  It is for me.  All the little things that have been building and building suddenly come pouring out and becomes gas on that fire that has been smoldering for some time.

Combined with the gas of your emotions, whatever set you off can quickly becomes a raging, out of control monster.

That almost happened to me this morning.  I was so angry and feeling such frustration with my website and the photos for the blog I wrote a letter to the blog man!  Thankfully, I went back over the letter and deleted most of it before sending it off or you might not be reading this right now!

Then I walked away for a bit.  After a nice walk I came back and deleted a great deal more and finally decided it was fit to send.

Because of all this I thought I would put together a little quick list of techniques to defuse anger and frustration before they get you into trouble. Let me know if you agree with any of these or if you have others!

5 Tips for Anger and Frustration

  1. Do Not Speak or Write Anything! Never speak out or write in anger. You will only hurt those around you, but more importantly you will damage your inner self.
  2. Have signal or word for those you love that is set up in a non-emotional time that will be the signal for everyone that you need to stop the escalation of the conversation and each take a few minutes to calm down.
  3. Walk Away – Simple but powerful. If you get yourself some distance you can calm down and come back with a clearer mind.
  4. Do not hold the little stuff in. Speak you mind gently while you are not angry. Junk in, junk out. Get it out of your mind and off your heart before it becomes a huge issue.
  5. Go get on your horse, or bike, or in your garden, work off a little of the steam doing something you enjoy to diffuse the anger before you come back and try to talk out the differences.

When you get angry or frustrated do you have a simple technique you could share with me so I can try it the next time I get mad?

Thank you for reading my weird, wild ramblings!  God Bless you all!

I am finally able to upload a photo again!  But this describes exactly how I felt all weekend!

Anger and frustration

Frustration and angry!

Have a great and glorious, frustration free week!

 

 

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